What It Really Means When You’re Being Judgmental

Have you ever been that girl? You know what I mean… that girl. The girl who can’t be happy for anyone else whether it be on social media or in real life, because she’s too busy judging and hating on everyone else? I think we’ve all had our moments!

e.g. “Ew, did you see her new boyfriend? I heard he’s under 6 feet tall. And he took her to Olive Garden for their one month anniversary. How tacky.”

I can honestly say I’ve been this girl about one too many times to count. Sometimes it feels so much easier to be mean and judgy than happy for other people. But what does it say about us when we act this way?

Well, I’m here to tell ya! This can actually give us so much insight into what we want in our lives when we are judgmental toward other people. Yes, maybe you think Olive Garden is tacky for a monthiversary. But in actuality when you’re judging and being rude to that couple, it speaks volumes in another way. You want love in your life! You wish you had a boyfriend who took you out to dinner. You wish you had someone to go on dates with and share bottomless breadsticks. And thats OKAY! When we can admit that we’re judging other people out of jealously and want, then we are able to take our lives to a whole new level.

Let’s go with another example. Let’s say that you follow a girl on Instagram who gets to travel for work, makes lots of money, and gets clothes sent to her for free. You might have thoughts like “Who does this girl think she is? She doesn’t deserve all of these nice things. HA! Must be nice to not have to work for anything in your life.” I’ll be honest, I’ve heard the phrase “must be nice…” about one too many times, and I literally hate it. It actually makes me cringe and gives me chills down my spine. Because guess what…

It is nice. It’s really nice, and looks nice, and you probably wish you had those nice things too. Guess what’s even better? You can. You have the ability to have whatever you want in life. You are where you are right now because of decisions and choices that you have made, whether you like them or not. So if you don’t like them, then change them! I could pick up tomorrow and decide that I want to sing on a cruise ship or move to the middle-of-nowhere Nebraska. We have so much more power over our lives than we realize. So when you’re feeling jealous, hateful or judgmental toward other people, take a deep breath and think. Realize that these feelings are coming up because they have something you wish you could have too. (Because let’s be honest, you wouldn’t comment on it if you didn’t care). So why not turn those negative feelings and emotions into something productive, positive and useful?

Step 1 is realizing what you’re jealous about in someone else, and acknowledging that you’re being jealous/hateful/angry because there is something there that you want too. Acknowledgement is key! If you can’t acknowledge that you’re being jealous then you can never move on and be productive in your life, because you won’t be able to get to Step 2, which is realization of desires. So I realize I hate this girl, because she gets to travel and not work and have financial freedom. Step 2 would be then acknowledging that I actually hate her because I also want to travel, not work and have financial freedom. So then Step 3 would be coming up with plans of action to take to get there.

Ah, plans of action. I could go into a whole other ramble about this. Some people say manifest and pray and things will happen for you. Some people say that’s a bunch of B.S. and you have to work hard to get things you want in life. I say…both. And neither! The best way I can put it is this: If you want something in your life, go after it. Because you do have the ability to have whatever your heart desires. And if you aren’t sure how to go after it, first start with clearing your mind and doing a manifesting meditation like this one. Once you are perfectly clear on what you desire, then start taking baby steps to get there. Apply for jobs in that new place, research apartments in that area, reach out to acquaintances you know who live there. Make a vision board. Meditate again. Go for a run. Visualize. Plan a trip. Plan a move. Whatever you want, you can have. I believe in manifestation mixed with inspired action. If you are taking action from a clear and inspired mind, the world is your oyster.

For more information on this topic, check out my lastest podcast!